▪️It's embarrassing to admit, but many parents love one of their children more. Does this mean they are "bad" parents?
From the moment her second son was born, Joanna knew that one of the two sons was her favorite. A woman who lives in Kent in Great Britain says that she loves both her children, but it is the youngest son who "grabs" her in a way that the first-born never could.
When Joanna gave birth to her first son, he was taken away from her due to health problems. She hadn't seen him in 24 hours. The woman believes that she missed an important stage of forming a bond with the baby, and that is why, when her second child was born, she began to give her priority.
"Our relationship can be briefly described as follows: in order to talk to the elder, I need to make an appointment," says Joanna, whose full name is withheld to protect her children.
"And my youngest, I can call even at two o'clock in the morning, and he will travel miles to meet me. My youngest is the nicest guy on the planet. He is caring, generous, polite and kind. He is the kind of person who will help anyone."
Joanna says she struggled with her feelings for years, but then she came to terms with it. "I could write a book about why I love one more than the other," she says. "It was hard, but I don't feel guilty."
Unlike Joanna, most parents don't openly say that they like one of their children better. Having a favorite child is one of the biggest parenting taboos, but research shows that most parents actually have favorites.
Realizing that your parents love you less than your brother or sister can seriously affect the formation of personality and lead to bitter rivalry between children. And therefore it is not surprising that parents, if they have a pet, hide it with all their might.
However, research also shows that most children cannot tell who their parent's favorite child really is. So, the real problem is how the parents themselves present the situation.
Katie Bishop
BBC Worklife
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