What is upbringing?
An educated person respects people regardless of circumstances. At the same time, different requirements are imposed on the child and the adult. It is enough for children to obey their parents and follow the rules established in the family. The respectfulness of an adult is manifested in following a good tone and maintaining the norms of behavior adopted in a particular environment.
An educated person, being in society, takes into account what customs are inherited in the country or family. For example, in the East it is customary for dear guests to pour an incomplete cup of tea. Replenishing the glass, the owners of the house once again show attention.
An adult has to maintain the level of education, because the world around does not stand still. Cultural trends and political views are changing. The foundations of manners are laid by parents, then a person educates himself.
A cultured person is distinguished by gestures, facial expressions, and speech. During a conversation, a well-mannered person does not wave his arms, pronounce the words in a calm tone, and do not grimace. Such a person reacts to the opinions of others, does not slander behind his back, releasing sharp and sharp things. A person with impeccable manners is called diplomatic, tactful, polite.
What kind of educated person is he?
Codes of conduct are created by people. Therefore, disagreements arise in the definition of a respectful person. Such disputes are easy to resolve. Ask the people around you why they consider you a well-mannered person. We list the criteria that are recognized by society:
1. Charm and good communication. An educated person radiates goodwill, speaks competently, does not resort to a raised tone. People are drawn to such a person, surrounded by attention.
2. Intelligence. For many, this is a synonym for a cultural personality. An intelligent person is restrained, laconic, with self-esteem. It does not get out of balance, no matter what happens around.
3. Tact and delicacy. A well-mannered person would rather remain silent than express an opinion that will offend the interlocutor. In conversation, he does not use swear words, does not touch on topics that are unpleasant to others.
4. Respect. Not ostentatious quality and playing in public is noted. A well-bred person will treat a stranger or a loved one with the same respect.
It is customary to consider well-mannered people modest, quiet, downtrodden and not having their own opinion. In fact, such a person is confident and self-sufficient, he does not need to prove anything to others.
Factors affecting upbringing
Raising a child is not only about instilling kindness and good skills. Adult people face betrayal, anger, hatred in life. Therefore, it is important to remove rose-colored glasses from the child in time. Tell children instructive stories, analyze examples from life.
Since the skill is laid from an early age, the behavior and character of a person are influenced by parents. What other factors affect upbringing?
1. Family relationships. A child in the womb reacts to light, sounds, voices. Therefore, building the right family relationships should not be from the day the baby is born, but from the day of conception. Banal conflicts lead to serious quarrels. Adults are not ready to give in, they are looking for the extreme or the guilty one. Take as a basis to discuss scandals and admit when you are wrong. Show your child that love and understanding reign in your family. In order for children to learn to respect other people, consider his opinion and allow him to enter into debates. Let him learn to defend his point of view tactfully and reasonably, and not with shouting and tantrums.
2. Environment. Mother or grandmother takes a greater part in the upbringing of the child. Cones fall on them if the child stumbles. The ideal scheme of upbringing is the equal participation of mom and dad. But, in addition to communicating with parents, the child attends kindergarten, school, circles. Children watch TV, play computer games, read books. Education is formed under the influence of information received by the child outside the home. At the same time, in adolescence, the opinion from the outside is valued more than the notations of relatives. In order not to lose authority, be interested in the affairs of the child, pay attention to him every day, analyzing together how the day went.
Do you want to grow a well-mannered person? Forget about the use of force, do not make comments to the child in the presence of strangers. Let your children know every day that he is important to you. By instilling rules of conduct in a child, adults maintain their level of deference.
Good breeding: innate or acquired quality?
Previously, it was believed that if you surround the baby with well-mannered people, then an angel will grow out of him. Research scientists have proven otherwise. Education is influenced by the efforts of parents and genes. Physical ability and health also contribute. No wonder couples who decide to adopt a child carefully study who he was born to.
Scientists have proven that heredity affects the upbringing of a person. If identical twins are separated in infancy and given to different families, then they will still retain the same character traits.
On the other hand, the rules of conduct laid down in the family have an impact on a person. Communication problems, aggressiveness, non-standard actions are the consequences of upbringing. Callous parents grow up aggressive teenagers. An unstable family environment leads to problems in adulthood. Scientists have identified factors influencing poor parenting: poverty, domestic violence, poor nutrition, the presence of bad habits in parents. It is possible to stop the destructive impact if you connect outside help. Participation of social services, the passage of rehabilitation programs.
Which side is the truth on? Is education an innate or acquired quality? In fact, it is impossible to consider the situation one-sidedly. A person is born with a set of genes that affect character. At the same time, being in society, succumbing to the influence of others, the personality changes, builds a line of behavior. Human manners are formed in equal parts under the influence of:
1. hereditary factors. Include the character, vulnerability and physical condition of the infant.
2. Education. It is formed as a result of the attitude of parents and others to the child, the presence of stressful situations and aggravating circumstances.
A person's personality is formed as a result of the interaction of heredity and upbringing. These two factors complement each other, connecting at certain segments of life. The first three years are dominated by genes, biological data. Then they weaken, and the environment of the baby is connected. During this period, genetic vulnerability manifests itself. Constant stress and depression change a person, affect respectfulness and disrupt brain function. Scientists have proven that proper upbringing can defeat genetic diseases.
How to become an educated person?
Surveys have shown that the level of upbringing is falling. Contribute to this other patterns of behavior. If we return to the recent past, we can see that the representatives of the weaker sex were brought up in institutes for noble maidens. In addition to education, girls were instilled with communication skills and decent manners. The gait was practiced, refined taste was instilled, attention was paid to behavior. The boys aspired to get into cadet schools, where, in addition to military wisdom, they learned responsibility, composure, and politeness. Today, in state institutions, education is assigned a role, but not upbringing. Giving all the cards to the parents. But, not all adults are ready to raise a worthy unit of society.
How to become an educated person?
1. Analyze your behavior. Think about what aspects or traits of character you would like to improve. Then ask your friends to give you a description. Work on your negatives and weaknesses.
2. Respect those around you. Start by eliminating negative thoughts. Don't let yourself think badly of other people. Before speaking out, giving advice, think about whether you would like to hear such words addressed to you.
3. Chat with people casually. People perceive the inability to maintain a conversation as bad manners. After all, such a person is silent or says nonsense. Enslavement, timidity, self-doubt leads to the fact that a person is embarrassed to speak out. In order not to pass for an ill-mannered person, learn to communicate with people.
4. Find the ideal. At first, you will need a role model to form the basics. Look for a well-mannered person among friends. The hero of a movie or book will do. If there is no suitable example, then make new acquaintances, communicate with people more often, note what qualities of character you like, learn from experience.
5. Accept other people's opinions. Sharp jokes about a person, making fun of behavior or clothes indicate a lack of education. Each personality manifests itself in its own way and does not need to impose your opinion. You can not make fun of people with physical or mental disabilities.
Good upbringing is formed as a result of heredity and the contribution of parents, the public. A person is able to improve this skill by working on himself. The level of upbringing is manifested in non-standard situations. If the manners of behavior are superficial, then under stress a person will break loose and show true emotions. Good breeding, given by nature and acquired during life, attracts with manners, sophistication, the ability of a person to communicate and look decent.
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