What you need to know about emotions.
Starting a conversation, it is worth saying that 2 sciences are closely connected here - psychology and biology. Emotions are one of the types of mental processes that reflect a person's attitude to himself and to the world around him. This is the experience of a person of something at a given moment in time. The strength of the experience depends on how significant this situation is for a person. But in addition to the experience, the mental component, there is a biological component - certain physiological changes - that occur in the body in parallel with the experience. Feelings are a very important part of each of us. They help to understand true desires, to know oneself. By the micro-emotions of the face, one can determine, for example, whether a person is lying or not.
Emotional reactions and the psyche of adolescents.
Adolescence is a period of intensive development and changes in the emotional sphere. At the age of 11-14, sharp mood swings and excitability are especially characteristic. In principle, everything that they experience is very polar - everything is either too good, or bad ...
It is important to pay attention to the problems of children, to help solve them, to treat a child of this age with understanding. After the age of 14, young people continue to explore themselves and the world, but their emotional state gradually becomes calmer. New events do not bring such a storm of feelings as before. They are better able to manage themselves. In general, in adolescence, a general emotional orientation is formed, so right now it is worth taking the time to develop this area.
What should the parents of an overly emotional teenager do?
For starters, don't panic. And do not try to change it immediately, here and now. At least, because it doesn't work that way.
In the case of increased emotionality, conversations are especially important. With each “losing your temper”, give the opportunity to calm down, and then speak. And, calming the child, do not regret, but listen to him and communicate with him. Not in the spirit of "don't worry, my golden, everyone around is bad, you're the only good one", by no means. Teach him to be aware of what is happening and solve his problems through communication, and not through shouting.
Not allowed to show emotions You have no idea how bad it is for the unborn child. From children who were not allowed to splash out their feelings, very secretive adults grow up, who then suffer all their lives from the fact that they cannot allow emotions to come out.
Hidden emotional reactions are a common cause of psychosomatic illnesses.
Speaking about the manifestation of feelings, one can`t address:
1. To the gender of the child - most often this happens in the direction of the boys - "why are you crying like a girl?".
2. By age - "so big, but you cry!".
3. To the feelings that are now “not the right time” to experience - “do not cry, it does not hurt at all!” - the question is, how did you know whether it hurts or not?
Learn to express emotions Stop and consciously talk about what is happening now. Understand who and why this or that feeling arose. For example, say: I'm angry because you promised me to go to the cinema, and didn't do it, instead of screaming, tears and resentment.
Look after yourself The way you behave in the presence of a child affects him very much. And if you scream, insults are constantly heard from you, do not be surprised if in the future you hear the same thing from a child.
Talk to teenagers Some may find this advice strange. “Well, I ask him how are you, how are your grades at school, good morning and good night, too. He replies "okay" and that's where the dialogue ends. What else do you need from me?!”
Develop emotional intelligence Both yours and your child.
Look at each emotional outburst not from the point of view of a problem, but from the point of view of another opportunity for development.